I’m such a queen!
That’s what I heard many times growing up. A jibe my bullies would throw at me referring to my gay qualities. Other words were thrown as well, from faggot to poof; all aimed at minimizing my masculinity and me as a person. The world in the 80s, 90s and even early 2000s were a tough time for the LGBT community in the world, with little acceptance and in many countries absolutely no legal protection. I write about what this kind of bullying did to me in my book that got published in 2019 by Bookstorm: “I am Costa, from Meth to Marathons” www.thisiscosta.com
Calling me a queen is making me feminine and in a misogynistic way ensuring I am aligned with a perceived weaker sex. “You’re such a girl” is another phrase that is part of many peoples everyday language perpetuating such sentiments and something very dangerous to keep saying as described here https://medium.com/@BriseidaAvelar/dont-be-such-a-girl-6703209e208d
As a diversity and inclusivity speaker I want to bring to light issues around such gender bashing of not only the LBGTQ community but of over half the world’s population. Where are people in your team or social group using such “casual” statements and how can we replace them with words of acceptance and encouragement?
Come to think of it, being a queen is something of an honor to be referred to. Just think of Queen Nandi – King Shaka’s mother whose strong will and resilience set an example to millions of women not to settle for less. https://www.news24.com/News24/queen-nandi-a-remarkable-woman-20140829
Queen? It would be an honor to be referred to one, to tell you the truth. Bring on your next insult!
Nomzamo Mbatha as Queen Nandi in Shaka Ilembe” Picture: IOL News Image via Instagram @nomzamo_m